funk soul brother right about now

Tonight is the Grad School Prom, which boasts a buffet, an open bar and cakes. The boy and I will be attending.

I am hoping that the prom will erupt into a frenzy of synchronized dance. Similar to the "Oh my God we all know the dance to this song" sequence found in She's All That.

google maps is sassy

a special thanks to fark for pointing this one out. please note step 20

chicago to london

penndot does not like me

My friend Jen stayed on my couch last night and had the pleasure of waking up at 7am to what she deemed "a symphony of construction."

To the left of my apartment building is a major road which has been blocked off into two lanes. At this site, the construction workers like to back their trucks up a lot so that they make that horrible beeping noise. I can now match the pitch of a truck backing up.

To the right of my apartment building is another construction site where the workers like to dig a big hole every Friday. They start digging the hole around 7am and by 5pm they cover the hole up again. They freaking love digging holes on Fridays. I haven't actually seen them put anything in the hole or take anything out of it. They just like to do it. And lucky for me, the big hole makes it impossible to get my car out of the parking lot and escape.

Next to the big hole is the renovation of a house. Those construction dudes just like to hammer things. I don't mind them as much. I just hate it when they play Foghat.

Generally I wouldn't mind the construction, but I'm fucking tired people. I'm exhausted. and a bit hungover.. and they keep backing their trucks up... and digging... and hammering... and using that big saw thing

yoooooo

In today's episode of 90210, David Silver was filming a music video and Donna saves the day by starring in it!

I was having a fairly boring/bland day, but then I saw Tori Spelling gyrating in fishnets. The day is now, officially, awesome.

um

the little song that goes with the video is definitely stuck in my head.

daft punk live at twilo

http://hometaping.org/2007/03/23/voila1111111111/

yes yes yes YES!!

SNL Classic

The Godfather in Therapy

pocket symphony

The new Air album Pocket Symphony is good. It's really good. I was just listening to it in my car, and it is an excellent night driving album. I am also finding it to be a good studying album, and I bet it will be a good sleepytime album as well. The possibilities are endless.

Air will be in
Philly on May 8
DC on May 9
NYC May 10

I may have to attend one of these dates. Although I'm not really sure what the live act would be like. I've never seen them. I imagine it might get boring. Has anyone seen them live? Tell me what to do.

Uncle Walter Finally Gets the Recognition He Deserves

Man to four-year-old with her mom: Aren't you a cute little lady?
Mom: Ain't you the one that was on the predator show on NBC?

--F train

via Overheard in New York, Mar 27, 2007

fake plastic love.

there's this whole concept of
deserving more
(not-but-you)
needing more
a plateau of inadequacy

punishment that goes both ways
arguing for a truth that
"might"
be a lie

expiration dates
spoiled milk
throw it or keep it
freeze time before it curdles

setting the bar for the future
it's not black and white
if gray didn't exist,
we'd all die of broken hearts

the namesake

I definitely have a thing for Kal Penn and really want to see the move The Namesake. However, it isn't playing ANYWHERE near here. pittsburgh theaters are lacking in decent movies.

but i guess i'll just put in harold and kumar, make kal penn my screen saver and call it a day.

a good morning booty bounce

this video is probably nsfw. and it's kinda ridiculous. but now you'll be yelling out "BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY ROCKIN' EVERYWHERE" for at least part of the day.

you're welcome.

don't stop don't stop now

no longer feeling rape-y today

Anti-Rape Device to Hit the Market

"The female condom-like device called Rapex has fish-like teeth that attach to the penis."

putin me on

i'm sure we are all well aware of my celebrity crush on vladimir putin.

kids say the darndest things

today my father told me a hilarious story from my childhood.

let me preface this by saying that i spent a great deal of my childhood hanging out with my grandfather. my grandfather, my papou, was a great man. he had a ridiculous sense of humor that both my brother and i inherited. he also hated cats.

apparently i once told my first grade teacher that my papou liked to bury cats in the backyard up to their heads, and then mow the lawn. my parents got a call from the school that day.

of course, my papou never did this. but he did make jokes about it. and clearly, i was not aware that people actually liked cats.

thumbs down

you know what is not delicious? almond butter. not on a rice cake. not even with honey. you people (not naming names) lied to me about this stuff.

Nature: 1 Nurture: 0

Little boy #1: You remember we don't like girls, right? I don't like girls.
Little boy #2: Yeah, but you should have worn your dinosaur shirt. They're very in today.

--LIRR

via Overheard in New York, Mar 25, 2007

postsecret

http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

i wish they had won too!

eats

i had delicious delicious peruvian food today from la feria. it's a cute restaurant and great for a light lunch. would go again.

this is what i do at the gym

how many lolas does it take to change a lightbulb?

not joking. i'm in need of someone taller than 5'4" to help me change the lightbulb in my kitchen. i'm short. so short that standing on a chair is not helpful.

this has gone on long enough. i've just been staring at the lightswitch longingly.

Absolutely Nothing -- But It Was the Way I Said It

College guy: Cannibal fetus appendix fucker!
Thug: Who are you callin' a can-- What the fuck was it you said?

--R train

via Overheard in New York, Mar 22, 2007

what are you listening to?

doves - m62 song
blu mar ten - drive
xtina - walk away
damien rice - animals were gone
dar williams - closer to me
dj shadow - six days
groove armada - my friend

white chicks and gang signs

pat benatar battles a pimp with her smokin hot moves

In Sicily, women are more dangerous than shotguns

goodbye productivity.

hello godfather boxed set.

avoidance

who wants to skip class and watch eternal sunshine of the spotless mind with me?

Clementine: This is it, Joel. It's going to be gone soon.
Joel: I know.
Clementine: What do we do?
Joel: Enjoy it.

greece v turkey

making plans to dance my ass off

YES YES YES

myspace says that fedde le grand will be at hiro on may 17, 2007. unfortunately, i can't go to that.

but i will be in DC when he spins at GLOW on may 19.

"Maybe, maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself."

More Departed Movies on the Way

Apparently a prequel and a sequel to The Departed will be made. I would say I'm skeptical about it, but if they have Marky Mark's character in both movies, I'm in full support.

Dignam is the shit.

fedde le grand

i heard this track when at club hiro in nyc. it is a SICK SICK track and it makes me want to dance my ass off.

the video is kinda nsfw.

A graphical dissertation on the number one song in America

this article KILLS me....

http://www.villagevoice.com/music/0711,harvilla,76021,22.html

"Yes. Mere mortals are hot like other people or things; having ascended to a higher plane, Mims is hot like Mims. It doesn't get hotter than that."

Britney and K-Fed in Five Years

Drunk mother: So, do... When we should send the kids to bed?
Drunk father: Well, the older one can stay up later tonight... What the fuck is that kid's name...?
Drunk mother: Brianna?
Drunk father: Who the hell...? I mean, Sabrina.
Drunk mother: You're holding Sabrina.
Drunk father: Cassie! Send the other two to bed in an hour or so, but Cassie can stay up later. [Baby in his arms starts to cry.] Shut the hell up, Cheyenne.

--Beach campground, Mindon, Ontario, Canadia

via Overheard at the Beach, Mar 9, 2007

blue grotto on the isle of capri

this was one of the most amazing/beautiful things i saw in italy. the video doesn't even do it justice. props to whoever took the video and put it on youtube though.

distracted by pancakes

this weekend i had brunch at a diner. the menu said "pancakes with fresh strawberries." it was an outrageous lie. the menu should have said "pancakes with red gelatinous goo that may have once been strawberries."

this is what i wanted



and this is what i got

scott storch... really?

rivalries that were a million times more interesting:
- 2pac, biggie and the whole east coast/west coast
- nas and jayz
- or really anything listed under this

College Senior Hopes To Turn Love Of Data Entry Into Career

sleepytime

i wonder how long it will take for the NyQuil to kick in. i am looking forward to an amazing night of sleep. hopefully it will block out all the screaming st pattys day drunkards.

saturday saturday

a haiku

oh dear, shame on me
ate a whole sleeve of saltines
fatty fat fat fat

miss muffy and the muff mob, courtesy of the pharcyde

still one of the sickest tracks ever

random musing brought on by insomnia

my old roommate and i used to have a perpetual debate on what our lives would be if we were really good looking. oftentimes we'd come home from the bar and drunkenly debate this topic until one of us eventually passed out. my argument was that our lives would be infinitely better, while she was convinced that our lives would be "boring" because everything would "come so easily."

what always struck me about my old roommate was her worldview. things were either "boring" or "fun." there was nothing in between. even in our never ending argument regarding what life would be like as a hot chick, she still saw things as either "fun" or "boring". this worldview eventually ended our friendship, as law school made me "boring."

boring or not, i still wish i was Giselle

oh yes

the soapnet plays back to back episodes of 90210 every day. in today's episode kelly told her boyfriend colin "you're not an artist! you're a prostitute!"

"like $2 malt liquor poured straight on the eyes"

DMX to Launch DMX Authentic and Earl Simmons Signature Collection Clothing Lines

i might as well record myself vomiting and sell it

CF: i think you will enjoy this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=el_LVfoDC-I
me: YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT

Don't Think I Don't See What You Do to Your Ken Doll

Six-year-old girl pointing to painting of naked man: I like that one!
Mom: You would.

--Brooklyn Museum

via Overheard in New York, Mar 13, 2007
And that's it!

tom goes to the mayor

goodbye nosering

we had some good times together. 7 years of good times to be exact. but now it is time to break up.

baby you send me

i want to go to coachella

april 27-29

http://www.coachella.com/

the 3day passes are freaking sold out and i have finals around then. but this would be amazing.

the bands i want to see:
Bjork
Interpol
Arctic Monkeys
Faithless
DJ Shadow
Brazilian Girls
Peaches
Felix Da Housecat
Rufus Wainwright
Of Montreal
Red Hot Chili Peppers
the Arcade Fire
Tiesto
Kings of Leon
Gotan Project
the Rapture
Blonde Redhead
!!!
Hot Chip
Ozomatli
Ghostface Killah
Air
Paul van Dyk
the Roots
Damien Rice
Placebo
Richie Hawtin
Lily Allen

things that i don't want to learn

hitting the ground running
a sprint to the end
thin arched eyebrows
a rosy complexion
resurrection of ghosts
beetlejuice
(beetlejuice)
(beetlejuice)
fading into shadows
swallowed whole
praying for
ugly made into beautiful
i'm losing over/under
vacant energies

Stop Licking Him -- You Don't Know Where He's Been!

Six-year-old to guy stranger while hiding behind mother on cell: Hi.
20-something guy: Hello...
Six-year-old, grabbing guy's hand: Hi.
20 something guy, confused: Hello...
Six-year-old to mom: I picked one!
Mom: You picked what? No! I told you that you could pick out the stamps, not a person! Put him back!

--Post office

Overheard by: Put back

via Overheard in New York, Mar 10, 2007

back to the burgh

ode to spring break in buffalo

upstairs
downstairs
pet the pups
sleep
laundry
throw things out
check voicemail
wander
take messages
throw more stuff out
look at homework
crave parliaments
chew gum
contemplate where friends are
monster.com
think about eating
take appetite suppressant
check pedometer
have existential crisis
pet the dogs

girl writes poetry using spam email titles

http://www.spam-poetry.com/


The English Make the Best Lovers

I just found out about her Aquinas midsection -
a type by throne discordant.
that organize as our monestary
close to able, bellicose
of count, too rancorous
go, slovenly orphanage
tetravent apology
[and] always on time;
God! save the Queen!

stab you

Hospital staff to wear stab-proof vests as violent patients on the increase

stab proof vest? fyi my birthday is in september.

things i found in my basement today

- a baby food jar filled with coins from various countries and new york city subway tokens
- script from a tv show i produced in college
- an ancient bottle of johnnie walker red label
- a giant pencil with ricky martin on it
- our bodies, ourselves
- really GROSS poetry written by a boy i used to talk on the phone with in high school
- inflatable monkey
- mangled plastic flowered leis
- friendly spiders

apparently you can get AIDS from watching tv

"Thanks CBS for turning my son GAY"

why not me

a day in the life

muffin: why did she have to be so hot? jesus
muffin: you cant even say "she could lose a couple and then she'd be cuter"
rats: haha..... would you rather he dated ugly chicks... then what would that say about you? ha
muffin: oh
muffin: good point
muffin: actually excellent point
rats: ha
rats: oh I found out tom petty's parents own like half of campbell's soup or something
muffin: wtf
muffin: taken out of context that sounds kind of hilarious

tipping

waiters usually get 20% or more from me. at hair salons, spas, waxings, piercings i will stick in the 20% range. and i try to give coffee shop baristas a dollar or various coins if i have them.

indian reservation gas station attendant who has only recently reached puberty? i gave the kid a dollar. i hope i didn't continue the oppression of his people with my minuscule tip.

dear myspace,

i think that you might possibly be the devil. i check you compulsively and can't really stop. i feel all warm and fuzzy inside when i get comments and sometimes find your "message" feature easier than email. there's a lot about you that i like, myspace. but sometimes you suck. sometimes i regret logging in and browsing. and sometimes i find things that i really don't want to know about. your features bring out the stalker in people. (and not just the stalker in me, but the general stalker in everyone.) i appreciate your enjoyable features, but perhaps we should take some time away from each other. some space might be good.

places that i was actually at this weekend

museums & eats
the met
coco roco
ali baba turkish cusine

drinks
thor at hotel rivington
earth

level V (vento)

hiro


my favorites? i'd say coco roco, hiro and vento

look what i found

in brooklyn...

(blurry but awesome)

I Never Go Anywhere without My Interpreter

Guy #1: My girlfriend is making me go see the Rachel Ray show live.
Guy #2: Why? Man, you need to put that shit to rest.
Guy #1: What does that even mean?
Guy #3: He's saying you're a pussy-whipped fag and that your girlfriend is a bitch.

--6 train

Overheard by: Shreve-ey-ey

via Overheard in New York, Mar 2, 2007

poo york

bye bitches! look for me on overheard in new york

just when you think life can't get any better, it's a popup video

some things

someone in my apartment complex has cooked the stinkiest most disgusting fish fry ever. it smells like they sauteed it with Crisco and rat feces.




today i went to the apple store. the apple worker that i have a love/hate relationship with was there. he was on the phone, so we didn't get to argue about my purchase or about how i am ignorant and he is brilliant. i love you apple store guy for that one time you offered me a cough drop. but i also hate you for talking to me like i'm an idiot every time i come to your store.

this song has been stuck in my head for THREE DAYS

spandau ballet - true