Monday, January 14, 2008

i love wikipedia right now.

the boy just introduced me to Nuwaubianism (perhaps the greatest thing i will ever read on wikipedia?) Nuwaubianism is a set of religious teachings based on the religious leader Malachi Z. York.

here is a little potpourri of religious beliefs i've extracted from the wikipedia article.

- White people are said to have been originally created as a race of killers to serve blacks as a slave army, but this plan went awry

- Nubians are said to be only accidentally a “brown” race – they have rusted in Earth’s atmosphere from their original green color because the magnesium in their melanin has been replaced by iron. The original, supreme, “Ether 9 beings” in Nuwaubian mythology were also green because of chlorophyll in their skin.

- Everyone is originally conceived as twins, but usually only one of the twins survives to be born.

- It is important to bury the afterbirth so that Satan does not use it to make a duplicate of the recently-born child.

- Furthermore,
some aborted fetuses survive their abortion to live in the sewers, where they are being gathered and organized to take over the world.

- People were once perfectly symmetrical and ambidextrous, but then a meteorite struck Earth and tilted its axis causing handedness and shifting the heart off-center in the chest.

- Disco was created by the devil to win the souls of the Nubians: “The evil one knows that he can control the music world as long as his agents are within the A & R (Artists and Repertoire, who are responsible for choosing who makes it in the music world) of the well known companies. He cannot evaluate Latin or Black music because he (the evil one) has no soul. He only duplicates it… He had to come up with something to win our souls through his means, and he did it with disco.”


YES. AMAZING.

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