what is she doing? i never know what she's doing...

He'll Forget It, Though; She Won't

Girl: I'm sorry I kicked you into a VIP table. I love you.
Guy: I'm sorry I called you a slut. I love you, too.

--L train

via Overheard in New York, Jan 31, 2008

i need to sleep for 10 years

i have reached a new level of sleepy. a delirious sleepy where it feels like i am swimming through life and not functioning. like fight club but without the whole tyler durden thing.

bye bye birdie

i love me some conrad birdie.

really really wrong? or so wrong it's right?

pink upholstered vagina couch for sale on craigslist.

omg i need this on my arm immediately

thank you ashleighd for bringing this to my attention.

my student loans have been approved

soon i will make it rain with my long term educational debt.

Study Finds Link Between Being Struck By Cream Pie, Diminished Social Standing

ITHACA, NY—By having cream-topped pies administered to their faces, men and women of high regard were seen to immediately drop in both status and esteem.

intentionally ironic graffiti found on wythe

do you think they giggled while they tagged?



xoxo williamsburg

buffalo things

the other night i watched the sabres game in the upper east side with some buffalo heads. hanging out with people from b-lo brings me lots of joy. we got to discuss several topics which i seem to only be able to discuss with buffalonians.

1. the goo goo dolls



2. the newsies



3. ham salad sandwich



4. the uniqueness of the buffalo accent

GREATEST TRADE EVER

tonight, i traded a single bottle of blue moon for my roommate's giganterous bottle of tanqueray. apparently i am the only person in the apartment who drinks gin. AMAZING. roommate has become my favorite person of 2008. soon my life will be comprised of drinking tanqueray and hosting britney blackout dance parties in my bedroom.

nate's new video

large evil insect thingies = not awesome

cloverfield = scary

as a brooklyn resident, i think i would have a marginally better chance of survival if manhattan was overrun by large evil insect thingies. i think. i don't know. i would be better equipped to fight insects as opposed to zombies. gaaaah, why did i watch this movie before bed!?!

pretty rocks. view from anacapri

YES. GREAT ADVICE

2012, the End of the World and Your Credit

"A human extinction scenario opens exciting financial possibilities for the average American to maximize their capital resources."

xoxo this movie

last night i watched across the universe. it was incredible, awesome, beautiful, ahhhhh! i loved it. i was not expecting to see bono in it either. great performance of i am the walrus.

time for a slow dance

gross gross gross GROSS!

so i was just reading this which brought me to this and now i've reached a new level of horror and disbelief. i just. i don't know. it's so wrong. i'm sorry for even writing about it.

illness

i have the stomach flu. there are a lot of negatives to having the stomach flu, negatives that mostly include vomiting, lack of productivity, and no delicious solid foods. on the positive side, i imagine the lack of food will result in weight loss, and the lack of productivity thing is helping me catch up on movies.

i love wikipedia right now.

the boy just introduced me to Nuwaubianism (perhaps the greatest thing i will ever read on wikipedia?) Nuwaubianism is a set of religious teachings based on the religious leader Malachi Z. York.

here is a little potpourri of religious beliefs i've extracted from the wikipedia article.

- White people are said to have been originally created as a race of killers to serve blacks as a slave army, but this plan went awry

- Nubians are said to be only accidentally a “brown” race – they have rusted in Earth’s atmosphere from their original green color because the magnesium in their melanin has been replaced by iron. The original, supreme, “Ether 9 beings” in Nuwaubian mythology were also green because of chlorophyll in their skin.

- Everyone is originally conceived as twins, but usually only one of the twins survives to be born.

- It is important to bury the afterbirth so that Satan does not use it to make a duplicate of the recently-born child.

- Furthermore, some aborted fetuses survive their abortion to live in the sewers, where they are being gathered and organized to take over the world.

- People were once perfectly symmetrical and ambidextrous, but then a meteorite struck Earth and tilted its axis causing handedness and shifting the heart off-center in the chest.

- Disco was created by the devil to win the souls of the Nubians: “The evil one knows that he can control the music world as long as his agents are within the A & R (Artists and Repertoire, who are responsible for choosing who makes it in the music world) of the well known companies. He cannot evaluate Latin or Black music because he (the evil one) has no soul. He only duplicates it… He had to come up with something to win our souls through his means, and he did it with disco.”


YES. AMAZING.

paper planes

ahhhh, great video. great song. and it looks like m.i.a. was filming in bed-stuy! i like it.

sunday morning thoughts

last night i crashed at my friend jen's apt. we had a late night out in tribeca, and i made the executive decision to stay in manhattan and not attempt a trek back to brooklyn. returning to williamsburg this morning was not exactly awesome. i looked like a hot mess and everyone else (seemingly) looked as though they were leading fulfilling, productive lives, unfettered by gin and parliament lights.

in my hot mess-dom, i decided that there needs to be some sort of "walk of shame" kit that you can buy at bodegas, duane reed, etc. that contains essential items to create a facade that suggests you are a functioning member of society.

outside st peters in the vatican, you can buy paper shirts, pants, etc. at little shops and stands. (you can't get into st peters if you have a little shoulder showing. god hates bare shoulders.) anyway, i was thinking the hangover survival kit would be like that. you can buy a paper hat, sunglasses, some blotting papers for the face, eye drops, a couple of those breath freshening strips and you're good to go! maybe even a little book to pretend to read on the subway. crime and punishment? the fountainhead? i think this thing would sell.



(picture is of sienna looking like a hot mess. just cuz')

similar?

think about it.

When Served with Ketchup, It's Black and White and Red All Over

Girl #1: Did you know that there's a cheeseburger that costs a thousand dollars?
Girl #2: What is it made out of? Panda meat?

--Hinch's, Bay Ridge, Brooklyn

via Overheard in New York, Jan 12, 2008

love note

dear lola,

it is one of our great pleasures in life to give you bad directions.

we are sorry for suggesting that you should walk from williamsburg to park slope instead of taking the subway. but you should have seen the look on your face! classic!

good luck trying to get around the city without us.

love,
hopstop

happy birthday stuart

i ran across you today, williamsburg bridge

just say no

dear bread,

we're done. you have made me fat once again.

hate rays,
lola

free the robots - jazzhole

awesome awesome EP.

stuart, i think you may like it especially.

highlights of the past week

- lunch dates on the west side
- a 3 piece mariachi band got on the L at 1st ave and got off at 6th ave. i waited for them to burst into song, but no such luck.
- drinks with wade garrett in the east village. (at a bar with possibly the greatest music selection ever?)
- visiting the MoMA
- gaslight lounge in the meatpacking district (real mobsters included)
- driving in nyc: across the williamsburg bridge, THROUGH manhattan (!!!), the holland tunnel and smelly smelly nj
- purchasing lots of french electronica with my itunes gift card

gaaaaaaaaaaaah noooooooooo

Better Yet, Provoke That Hobo

Teen girl: I was worried it had rabies or something. But seriously, how cool would it be if I got to go back to Tennessee and say I'd been mauled by a squirrel while I was in New York?
Mom: Well, we've got health insurance now, so you go ahead and give it another shot. I'll get it on video.

--Isham & Cooper

Overheard by: Rose Fox

via Overheard in New York, Jan 4, 2008

exciting

Obama takes Iowa

he's back! and in a cape?

some helpful (and maybe not helpful?) things i've discovered

fitness

getting around town (why does it always lie to me?!)

open bar nyc

you know you love it

new developments, ponderings on my first few days in the nyc

- i live in williamsburg brooklyn (weird?)

- my roommates are really awesome. very chill.

- there is a bench around the corner from me that has an emaciated hipster smoking a cigarette perpetually perched on it. i've lived here for about 32 hours but i've seen at least 5 unhappy looking hipsters chainsmoking on this bench. (i wonder if the bench has been blessed by morissey? is it a hipster mecca? will attempt to solve mystery soon.)

- driving on the BQE is one of my least favorite activities of all time. mainly because it is one big blobby pothole.

- giving people a death stare is not only effective, but fun.

- it's possible that i hate new years as much as i hate the fourth of july.