i can't even come up with a witty title for this post. i just can't

Salad Swiped From Man's Fridge; Knife Stuck In Door

"SOMERSET, Pa. -- Someone kicked in the door of a man's apartment, stuck a knife in the door and took a chilled salad from his refrigerator.

Somerset police said the man reported the bizarre burglary on Monday. He told investigators someone broke into his apartment while he went to a nearby tavern. Nothing but the salad was missing, police said.

Police said they have a suspect and expect to file charges once they finish their investigation."


omg. i can't even wrap my head around this. break-into house, stick knife in door, steal salad. really? really?!? was it a pittsburgh-style salad with french fries on the bottom? did it have bits of crack in it? was the salad bowl made of gold? my brain can't just handle this one. i need to go lay down. (lie down?)