A list of old timey exclamations deemed appropriate for stressful work situations

- jiminy christmas
- goodness gracious
- oh heavens
- good golly
- for pete's sake
- gee whiz
- (you can) fall in

hearts

Hard lessons learned - a short list

- keep drunk lola away from social media
- always take contacts out and put spectacles on before bed
- don't take full glasses of wine to bed
- wine stains are difficult to remove from cotton sheets
- sometimes the laundry lady is gonna think you murder people.
- tip well. tip often. tip like you're in my blue heaven.
- be nice to everyone. you never know when they'll pop up again.
- floss your goddamn teeth
- erase your google history
- check the expiration dates
- beware of men who liberally use emoticons
- listen to voicemail (don't just fast forward to get the notification indicator off)
- for the love of god, just make coffee at home. $5 lattes are ludicrous

sometimes it seems that, all I have to do is worry. and then you're bound to see my other side